Category: Correspondence
Dear Spammers
Screw you!!! Yours sincerely, Kaf P.S. Seriously, up yours.
Memo to the Jackass
Stop being one. We're all so very tired of it. From: Kaf CC: Asshole
Open letter for comedy’s sake
Dear League of Associated Funny Folk, I'm trying my best. Sincerely, Kafkaesquí Oseo P.S. My dues check is enclosed. P.P.S. Yes, I'm aware this isn't funny. I said I ... (more...)
A Christian suggestion
Dear Christians, Pat Robertson is making you guys look far worse than you tend to do on your own. These days. For the most part. ... (more...)
Open Letter To Comedy Central
Dear Comedy Central Executives, You suck. I'm being serious. You suck. No, don't try to take solace in the belief you suck in the standard, cable channel suckiness ... (more...)
To: Marybeth@ShopAmericaNetwork
From: Kafkaesqu{{ Oseo To: Marybeth@ShopAmericaNetwork Cc: guff Subject: RE: Information Request Marybeth, Although I'm unaware of your operation and have not contacted you previously, I was heartened to see an ... (more...)
I recently received this e-mail message
If anyone feels up to it, a Weird to English translation would be much appreciated: From: ********@***.*** Subject: Hello! To: kafkaesqui@ Date: Mon, 10 Feb 2003 16:55:10 +0800 Reverent swami: How ... (more...)
The following is my generic hate letter template
I created it for when I'm so pissed off I can't write straight, but still need to send something off before my ire subsides. I ... (more...)
E-mail Reply To Sarah at Mumble-Mumble.com
> Hi Hello! > I visited kafkaesqui.blogspot.com, and noticed that you're not > listed on some search engines! You are unusually curious, Sarah, and no doubt a highly caring ... (more...)
From the Desk of God
Dear Kaf, I assume you do not mind Me calling you Kaf. Not that I am concerned with being presumptuous; that is something I have always ... (more...)
New Internet Rules
Discovered cross posted to numerous newsgroups (and all off-topic): From: Horatio Tonkin (horton@greeneggs.sam.im) Subject: Internet Usage Guidelines - Preparatory Notice Newsgroups: <various> A group of concerned Internet users I ... (more...)
Psychic Spam
Date: Tue, 19 Mar 2002 13:28:12 -0800 (GMT) From: Shandrakar <customerservice@astraldimensions.esp> To: Kafka Esqui Subject: {Re:} Please, No More! Mr/Mrs/Miss Esqui, In regards to the e-mail you will send ... (more...)