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Confused Similes

• As useless as a broken ice tray not yet in the freezer.
• As distracting as those bouncy head things you see on desks… I mean the backs of cars.
• As funny as that joke I like. How does it go?
• As fast as an Olympic sprinter encircled by a wall of fire.
• As open as a door.
• As cheesy as aerosol spray cheese. (This one’s on target if you think about it)
• As successful as a whore at a virgin convention.
• As unsuccessful as a whore at a virgin convention.
• As tall as a rhino on a pumpkin.
• As smart as a scientist of some kind or other type of smart person.
• As short as a penguin that’s often out of the water.
• As stupid as it gets.